Dim those head lights, pull up to the curb, and say good evening to the ever so evocative Kristi. She's tonight's Toil Girl and she's packin' more heat than a Tijuana tamale.


For her portrait, the lovely Kristi invented an alter identity that goes by the name of The Topless Detective. She's a no-nonsense gumshoe that happens to be smart, sassy and seductive. Kristi asked for Veronica Lake, Sharon Stone and Mae West all rolled up in a trench coat, a fedora hat and a pair of silk stockings. Our detective employs methods of interrogation that are so hot they had to invent a fourth degree for the type of burns she leaves. Kristi told me the Topless Detective is far from a wall flower. To quote her, " She likes her men like she likes her fried chicken -- kinda crisp and crusty on the outside, but soft, tender and juicy on the inside". Don't be too intimidated by her candor, Kristi disclosed. "She won't bite . . . unless you ask her nicely".


Kristi imparted that she is a big fan of mid-century modern design (Eames-Panton-Sputnik et al.) from the atomic era. She later suggested we go farther back for her cruising vessel and figured a sleek pair of vintage fins attached to a '59 El Dorado couldn't help but to embellish a gorgeous pair of midnight legs.


As a massive fan of both golden era film noir and classic cheesecake art, I relished the idea of creating this gams, guns and grills piece of pin-up art. I'm quite satisfied by the results and giddy to see it hanging from the gallery walls here. Kristi's words of praise are more yummy icing on the cake:


Mr. Toil, thank you for sharing your artistic gifts in praise of the full-figured woman. I love your sexy, beautiful images and having one of my own has been on my wish list for some time.


To our glamorous gumshoe may I return the gratitude for your praises. And to all of you nefarious art heisters out there, be mindful: Kristi--or the Topless Detective--won't hesitate to create a few more breathing holes in anyone who tries to walk away with her portrait. I think she'd probably prefer if you tried laying your hands on the real thing.


Hugs, respect and more thanks for the way-cool theme Kristi.

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